Been 3 weeks since the school starts… 5 weeks since I finish my production shoot… However, I seem to lost the energy to finish my short film… No idea why… Maybe I keep asking myself… so what if I finish my short film? so what if my short film wins an award? so what if I am graded A or C for my FYP? It does not matter to me no more… I don’t think filming is what suits me… Why do I chose film in the 1st place? From a multimedia developer to an animator to a filmmaker… what do I really want in life?

I don’t really know… I remember someone telling me that if you want to earn money, don’t stay in film unless u really do have a passion to create something to tell something to the audience… do I really have something to tell the audience? NO… nothing… after my FYP project, I have nothing to say or tell… What I am looking for is a job that can provide a good command of pay… so I am able to live live to the fullest… no need to worry about financial burden… So, should I still stay in the industry? I have no idea… especially after my 4 years of hard work… and building of profile and network around this industry…

I really do need some advice… and need it fast… so I start working towards my goal without delay… else, it will be hard for me to put my energy into my work and daily life… I don’t know… god… or mummy… please do give me some advice and light and guide me through this hurdle… the hurdle of my life that could determine who and what I am in the years to come…

Steam running out… motivation dropping… energy depleting faster then I thought…

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